Blah(g) Blah(g) Blah(g)

So I am sitting here on my day off wondering why Kaylan is not growing.  Wondering how God could allow us to blessed with conceiving twins, and then allowing the possibility of one of them to not make it.  On the surface, it just doesn't seem to make sense.  Doesn't God say that he loves the children?  What if she doesn't start growing and pull through?  Did he not want us to have her anymore?   Did he change His mind about blessing us with two babies?

And as I sit here asking God some real difficult raw questions, I start to think of the last 3 weeks of my life.  I think about how this child, although unborn, has changed our entire lives.  I went into the doctor's office at week 20 taking the babies health for granted.  (We had never even heard of IUGR -{ Interutarine Growth Restriciton.})  I went in to the visit thinking of these babies as nothing more than a "neat idea" that would not have any affect on my routine until July or August.  I came out with an appreciation and an incredible love for these babies.

And our friends and family?  They have been amazing!  Supportive would be an understatement.  Friends tell us how they are praying for these babies (Kaylan especially) on daily basis.  We get calls or emails or texts about the health of the babies every day.  Our relationships have strengthened.  Our friendships have been more open.  Our marriage has grown stronger.  Our walk with God has been the closest it has ever been.  Our prayer life is as deeper and stronger than ever.  And this is just a few things that have changed over the last 3 weeks.

So I don't know how the situation with Kaylan will end.  I suppose only God does.  We are going to continue to pray for nothing short of miraculous healing and full health of both babies.  But if I take a step back and see how God has worked in our lives over the past 3 weeks, I would not trade this unfortunate circumstance for anything.  I would not wish that anybody ever have to go through this type of situation, but from where I sit right now, I am blown away by God's incredible grace in such a difficult time.

(This Rob Bell video just reminds me of where God is and how he is working in the midst of a tough time. It has blessed me, so I figured I would share it.)

Landon